Serious Monkey Business - Home of the Monkey Dong, Monkey Flask & Monkey Urine.

There are tons of brands of synthetic urine out there, and you’ll read about how brilliant they all are in the synthetic urine reviews all over the Internet.

The best synthetic urine actually has to meet some really specific standards if you hope to pass using it, and unfortunately, a lot of people don’t realize how few brands achieve those standards.

Plus, it’s not just about the quality of the fake pee. You can mess it up yourself, either by having at the wrong temperature when you submit it or getting caught with a fake sample on you.

So let’s look not only what the best synthetic urine you can get your hands on is, but also how to get it to the right temperature, and also how to properly submit fake pee for a drug test.

Ways To Pass A Drug Test

When it comes to passing a drug test, you have three main ways of doing it, that will give you a great chance of not getting caught when your body is riddled with drug toxins:

1. You can submit a sample of fake urine, which is what we are talking about here.
2. You can do a natural detox. Sure, you can accelerate this using detox pills, but it can still take some time, and most drug tests don’t give you more than a day, maybe two days, notice.
3. You can use a detox drink. These flush out the toxins and mask the fact you’ve done it for about five hours. That can be fine, but the risk is around getting your hands on a good detox drink, getting to the lab in good time, and not having such a high toxin count that it overrides effects of the detox drink.

Preparing Fake Pee To Submit

The key to preparing a fake sample is to make sure that you know how to keep the urine warm, and by that, I mean the fake urine.

The key to this is microwaving the fake sample to get it roughly within the right temperature range. Human urine comes out of the body within a very specific temperature range, between 96°F and 100°F.

Legally, it has to be between 90°F, and 100°F, so you have to get the temperature the sample within that range, and then keep it there, sometimes for a couple of hours.

Activate the heatpad if you are using one, and strap it to the sample. Then monitor it closely, to make sure it stays within that temperature range.

The alternative is to use a synthetic urine kit called Sub Solution. That uses heat activator powder. So you don’t need a heatpad, and that gives you closer control over the temperature because you can simply add more powder to increase the temperature whenever you want.

How To Keep Fake Pee Warm

Once you’ve got the temperature where you want it, then you need to go and submit the sample, which means you need to know how to keep the fake pee warm all the way up to the moment you go into the lab to submit it.

Make sure you look at the temperature outside. If you live in New York, and it’s January, it could be really cold outside. Likewise, if it’s August, it could be really warm. So you need to prepare for the fact the temperature externally could swing the temperature of the sample strapped to your leg by several degrees, by dressing accordingly.

I would recommend you only consider using high-quality fake urine, and use the heatpad supplied with it. Although these aren’t always reliable, they are far better than just using standard hand warmers. But again, Sub Solution uses heat activator powder, which is why I tend to use that if I can.

Tips On Submitting A Fake Urine Sample

When it comes to learning how to use fake pee successfully to pass a drug test, it’s actually submitting the sample which is where a lot of people fall down. You have to keep the temperature right, as we’ve already talked about. But more than that, you have to get the fake sample into the lab, not be spotted, and submit it without getting caught.

The key to doing this is thinking about it, and preparing for it by practicing. The best tips I can give you on using fake urine for a drug test are:

1. Make sure the sample is strapped to your crotch, or the inside your leg, where it won’t show as a lump.
2. Wear loose clothing, to disguise the bulk of it when you walk.
3. Make sure you practice walking and wearing the fake sample. Otherwise, you will look slightly awkward and could get pulled aside.
4. Practice removing the sample from your body, and submitting it into a cup smoothly and silently.
5. Consider the environment you will be in. You might just be behind the screen, rather than a different room from the person administering the sample. So you may have to be very quiet, and they might be listening out for the sound of you going to the toilet, as many people do because they can’t stop after peeing into the cup.

Synthetic Urine Reviews: Best Fake Urine Brands 2020

So look, in my experience, and I’ve used fake urine quite a few times to pass drug tests for jobs, it’s by far the easiest and safest way passing a drug test. You just need to practice, consider the actual process of submitting it, and also carefully guard the temperature so that it’s always between 90°F and 100°F. You can practice all of these things to make sure you are prepared.

In terms of the best synthetic urine kits, then you will be looking for synthetic urine brands that get great reviews, and tons of recommendations that are not obvious advertising.

In my experiences, two brands contain the ingredients that will pass validity testing. Validity testing is where the sample is tested to make sure it has chemical markers in it that are only present in human urine, things like urea and uric acid.

But more than that, they will check it’s specific gravity and the pH level. They will also potentially smell it, and froth it, to see that it looks natural. That’s before you even consider the fact that some labs now test for the presence of artificial preservatives called biocides.

So with all that in mind, the four synthetic urine brand I would recommend to anyone are:

4. Monkey Whizz Synthetic Urine

Another option is Monkey Whizz synthetic urine. I want to clear up the confusion here by telling you that Monkey Whizz isn’t actually the synthetic urine, it’s a product in a range of four.

The actual basic synthetic urine product is called Monkey Flask, ( one bottle costs $39.95), which is the equivalent of Quick Fix. You get premixed urine that contains the most basic chemicals found in human urine (urine, uric acid, creatinine), and you get a decent quality heatpad.

If you want to go up a step then you can buy Monkey Whizz, which is the same urine but with slim heatpads and a dispensing belt. Attach the belt to you once you fill it with the urine, and then you can dispense it through the attached plastic tap.

For me it’s actually a step too far in terms of complexity, putting pressure on you with extra steps when you get to the lab. Because you’ll be unobserved, you don’t need to mimic the action of actually going to the toilet, either by standing or sitting. The Monkey Whizz belt is probably an overkill.

However, the Monkey Whizz belt is better at keeping urine close to human temperature because of the fact the urine product spreads out close to your skin better than carrying the small flask that you get with Monkey Flask (or Quick fix, or any other brand that uses heat ads). So it could be an insurance policy against a failing heatpad.

3. Quick Fix 6.2 Synthetic Urine

If you are looking for affordable synthetic urine that will pass all basic urine sample drug tests, then the latest formula of Quick Fix, 6.2, is certainly a brand to consider. It’s not the most complex formula on the market, but it is the second-most complex, and easily good enough for all but the toughest drug test.

It’s also a lot cheaper than the market leader, one bottle costs only $39 and if you are up for a pre-employment, or during an employment drug test, it’s complexity is certainly enough to pass any type of basic drug test. So the combination of price, complexity, and ease-of-use makes Quick Fix 6.2 a really intelligent choice.

On top of that, the heat pad and thermometer you get with Quick Fix 6.2 is good quality. You are unlikely to get caught out with inaccurate temperatures, or with the heat pad failing during that crucial time when you are heading off to the lab.

2. Clear Choice Sub Solution Synthetic Urine

Monkey Whizz Quest Diagnostics 2019 Online

Sub Solution is definitely one of the best synthetic urine brands on the market for a couple of reasons that put it head and shoulders above the rest.

• Firstly, the formula is the most complex on the market. There are 14 chemical markers that you will find in real urine, making it suitable for passing even a complex drug test.
• On top of that, it doesn’t contain biocide, an artificial preservative that some drug testing labs now search for the presence of.
• Thirdly, it looks and smells like real human pee (most brands have unnatural color!), it will even produce some foam if you shake it up.
• Using Sub Solution is also a lot easier than other synthetic urine kits because you don’t need a heat pad or microwave. That makes it perfect for keeping with you, in your car, or in your locker. All you need is a couple of minutes with some water, to mix the solution, heat it up, and you are ready to submit it.
• Sub Solution uses heat activator powder. You pour it in, agitate the liquid, and as it dissolves it creates heat, which warms the liquid to the right temperature. This powder is undetectable once dissolved.

So when you go to submit a sample of Sub Solution, you haven’t got worried about smuggling a heating pad in, you know it’s got the most complex formula that mimics human urine, and if the sample cools just before you submit it, simply add a bit more heat activator powder to get it to the right temperature.

You can buy Clear Choice Sub Solution on from the manufacturer’s website.

So although it was top dog for several years, big brother Quick Luck has pushed Sub Solution into the second spot. But it’s still incredible quality, and the second best option out there. It’s $20 less than Quick Luck if that amount of money matters to you.

For any type of standard drug test, Sub Solution is just as good at passing is Quick Luck, you just don’t get that added convenience of the added pair of heatpads, or the premixed urine.

1. The Best Synthetic Urine Kit: Clear Choice Quick Luck

This is the synthetic urine that knocked Sub Solution off top spot, after several years as the most trustworthy fake urine brand. It’s also made by Clear Choice, and it’s actually really a development of Sub Solution.

So you’re really getting the pedigree of Sub Solution but on steroids. That doesn’t mean Sub Solution is no good anymore, it just means it’s been pushed down into the second spot by a superior formulation.

First, it’s premixed. The only downside to Sub Solution was that you needed about a minute to mix it with water. That made it tougher to mix up in the cab of a lorry, or in a toilet cubicle just before you faced an immediate drug test.

All those potential on the spot preparation problems is gone with Quick Luck. You simply have a vial of premixed urine that is incredible quality. Not only does it contain the 14 chemical markers that Sub Solution does, but it contains several more, to really address the most invasive validity testing.

You still get the brilliant heat activator powder, which means you can raise the temperature in literally one minute. But you also get a pair of high-quality heatpads, for if you want to heat the sample in advance and keep it warm.

Just to show you how quick and safe is to use, let’s give you the instructions for using Quick Luck under pressure scenario. Let’s say that you are told in your workplace to report to an office for a drug test right now.

1. You detour to the locker room. In your locker, you’ve got Quick Luck and the heat activator powder.
2. You quickly tap in about a third of the heat activator powder and gently shake the bottle (obviously putting the lid on, or at least hold your thumb over it).
3. After about one minute you should see the temperature rise significantly. About one-third of the powder should get the lukewarm fake urine to within the right temperature range. If it’s still a little cool, tap in a small amount more and repeat the process.
4. Once you’ve got the temperature strip registering, tuck it in your underwear so it’s close to your skin to maintain that heat for a little while, and go and submit your sample. The whole process will take about two minutes.

My final top tip for the ultimate solution is to buy Quick Luck and the practice kit. The practice kit is available as a combination deal when you buy Quick Luck.

It contains everything apart from synthetic urine. So you can use water to do practice runs before you use the Quick Luck synthetic urine. That means you can use the heat activator powder in the practice kit to see how the temperature rises, you know how long it takes, how much power it will need. It just gets you used to the whole process, and I’m telling you it’s a real confidence booster have that knowledge of how it’s going to go.

You can purchase Quick Luck from Testnegative.

Synthetic Urine For Drug Test: Conclusion

I really hope this has helped you to understand about using synthetic urine to pass a drug test and the pitfalls of doing so. As you now know, there are three main reasons why people fail drug tests using synthetic urine:

• The synthetic urine is poor quality
• The urine has unnatural color, it fails the visual inspection
• The temperature of the fake sample is not maintained correctly
• They get caught with the fake sample on them

Using the simple guide I’ve written here, you can avoid all of those pitfalls, and successfully pass drug tests any time you want, using synthetic urine without having to worry at all.

SYNTHETIC URINE FAQ

Do synthetic urine belts work?

Monkey Whizz Quest Diagnostics 2018

Yes, synthetic urine belts work. As long as you have a couple of good quality thin heat pads that you can slip inside them, then the temperature will definitely be within the right temperature range unless you have a disaster.

In terms of actually using them to dispense your sample, then yes they do work for that as well. But you have to be discreet, and you have to practice in advance, making sure that you can turn the tap on and off silently, and submit the sample in a natural manner.

Can synthetic urine be used for all types of tests?

Synthetic urine can be used for any type of drug test as long as it’s unsupervised. For a supervised drug test, you can only really use synthetic urine if you use an internal carrying device or external prosthetic (depending on whether you are female or male).

Synthetic urine will also struggle for more advanced urine sample drug tests. These are expensive tests that are commissioned to look for a wide range of substances, and that have a more detailed analysis done on the sample to make sure it’s accurate. But the best synthetic urine brands will still pass close scrutiny.

Does Labcorp test for synthetic urine?

All urinalysis testing companies test for synthetic urine. They do this by checking the temperature, then checking for the presence of chemicals that should be in urine, and also then potentially checking for chemicals that are not in human urine.

Labcorp is rumored to be one of the companies that test for synthetic urine by looking for the presence of biocide. This is a synthetic preservative that comes in many brands of fake urine, and so checking for its presence is an easy way to rule out a fake sample. The best synthetic urine kits Sub Solution and Quick Luck DONT contain biocides!

What happens if you get caught using fake pee?

Monkey Whizz Quest Diagnostics 2019 Free

Although 18 states in the USA have currently made it illegal to use a fake sample, or sell fake urine for the purposes of avoiding a drug test, in most states, it’s only a misdemeanor. Only four states have it classified as a felony. But the truth is that in all the time this legislation has existed, only one urine seller has ever been successfully prosecuted for marketing urine to pass a drug test.

In terms of submitting a fake sample, it’s illegal to tamper with a legally administered drug test. You will certainly not get the job, keep yourself out on probation, or not have any consequences from the people who administer the test. However, legally, it’s incredibly unlikely that you will ever be criminally prosecuted. For a pre-employment drug test, if you get caught, no employer on earth is going to bother trying to get you arrested.

How long is synthetic urine good for?

Fake urine will be good for as long as the date on the box says it is. But if there is no date, or you’re not sure, then a maximum of a year after the date of purchase is usually accepted as the maximum time it will stay fresh for.

In terms of how long synthetic urine is good for once you have exposed it to air, or mixed it up from a powder into liquid, then 24 hours is the absolute maximum, and even then only if it’s refrigerated. Once you’ve mixed it up, if you’re going to keep it at the right temperature to submit it, or leave it at room temperature, then five hours is usually a good maximum to abide by.

How to keep fake urine warm?

There are really only two ways to keep synthetic urine warm to submit it at the right temperature. The first way is to use the heat pad that is included in most synthetic urine products. This is often good enough to keep the sample within the right temperature range (between 90°F and 100°F) for several hours.

Monkey Whizz For Sale

The second method is to use heat activator powder, which is contained in synthetic urine products made by a company called Clear Choice (Sub Solution and Quick Luck). Rather than using a microwave and heat pad, you simply add heat activator powder to the urine and it will raise the temperature. You can do this just before you go into the lab, or use it in combination with a heating pad for a double insurance policy.

Where to buy synthetic urine in stores?

Considering how large the synthetic urine market is, it’s actually available in an incredibly small amount of physical stores. A lot of this is around legality. Everyone knows that when you buy synthetic urine you are trying to evade a drug test, but you aren’t legally allowed to sell it for that purpose.

The only places that can get away with selling it without any sort of backlash are small shops like smoke shops, independent retailers, sex shops, places like that. They mostly sell it as novelty urine fetish or four joke purposes and get away with selling it on that basis. So you won’t be able to buy synthetic urine in many physical stores other than the odd independent place. You’re far better off buying it online anyway because the quality is so much better.